Thanks to Janet (not
real name) for sharing her story of mentoring a Second Helpings’ mentee.
When I first began mentoring, I didn’t quite know how to
support my mentee. She seemed to have all the help she required. She was doing
well in school, and staying busy with her family and friends. I didn’t see or
hear from her much because of her busy life. I thought she was on the right
track. Did she really need me?? I was lucky to be matched with such a creative,
smart, caring woman, but I was having problems reaching out to her. She did
want to have a mentor in her life; I just needed to give her enough time to
trust me and share her problems and struggles.
When we met during the first few months of our relationship,
we had easy conversation about our day-to-day lives. She talked quite a bit
about her past, explaining why she was in her current situation. I tried to not
question her too much; I genuinely enjoyed listening to her story (she has a
great sense of humor too). I was
learning about her complex life a little bit at a time, which was fine with me.
I wanted to be a part of her support system, yet I still questioned exactly how I was going to do that.
Each time we got together (usually at a coffee shop with
baked goods!), she shared something new about herself. I was beginning to see
how I may “fit in” with her busy life. I had an “aha” moment when I realized
how I could have a positive influence on her life. I’m someone who offers her a
different perspective; she listens to my opinions and ideas. I realize she may
be sharing some thoughts and concerns mainly with me; I’m a “safe” person for
her to bounce ideas off of. I also give her a reason to “get out” and explore. Really,
I feel I’m there to listen more than anything.
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